Your front door was just smashed open. What do you grab for self­ defense?

Well first I grab my fan made castlevania lords of shadow chain whip off my wall and wrap the handle with the molding putty i use in my after school art class and spread it over the handle.
Then I grab the spare car battery I stole from my step dads junker and connect the wires to the chain of the whip. After I put the battery in my bojack horseman hollywoo duffiebag so I can carry it around and barn. Instant electric whip